la vie en rose
Saturday, September 26, 2015
Saturday, September 26, 2015
The last post I will write about you.... because I think I'm ready to be "dead" now.
Tuesday, April 21, 2015It's tangible, it's not some feeling, it rocks your brain and crushes your bones, It's sucks because I can't do any thi...
Tuesday, April 21, 2015
It's tangible, it's not some feeling, it rocks your brain and crushes your bones,
A song I'm pretty sure I wrote for you.
but you can't get another me,
It's sucks because I can't do any thing, your not here, 'death' doesn't give a crap that I sit and wait for you at that park bench, or drive around listening to that song looking over to see if you're singing along, your gone. And 'death' leans back in his massage chair kicks up his feet and laughs... Because he's won.
And maybe you were inspired when you said death
death
death
death
Because I know everyone was thinking it but I was to scared to believe it.
But you weren't
Maybe we were born to the end
But I don't think you were born to be with her because your hand fits too well in my heart
And you don't think I was made for this because I flinch when you touch me, but that's only because last time you did I felt your knife graze my back..
And you don't think I'm made for you because when I talk all your ears do is scream but when she does they sing...
A song I'm pretty sure I wrote for you.
And my hearts voice echoes in my ear when it should be yours..
threw tears she screams you will find another him,
you will find another him
you will find another him...
but you can't get another me,
And I feel my heart breaking so I reach for the duck tape because I'd rather be full of tape then heart break
And i'm tired of hearing me say it's fine, no I'll be ok.
And your tried of the commitment.
You're so ready for death.
You're so ready for death.
So that's what we did.
And I force my self to believe its better this way. because it's easier when you walk away. It's easier when I don't hear the voice mail.
We died.
We died.
Not true.
But its all I'll ever get out of you.
old pieces of your heart
Monday, March 09, 2015our love was like the stars.. a little to cliché. it was like capital letters at the beginning of a college essay. Very Perdictable. ...
Monday, March 09, 2015
our love was like the stars..
a little to cliché.
it was like capital letters at the beginning of a college essay.
Very Perdictable.
it was made up of cute stares and i wish you were here's.
our love wasn't strong and it wasnt meant to last until the end of time.
but it was the sun.
it didn't reached every heart of the earth.
our love isn't the way you look at her.
and it isn't the way she looks at him with her lips on yours.
our love was held in our hands and when you let go, i was left palm up, with a couple notes and some old pieces of your heart.
a little to cliché.
it was like capital letters at the beginning of a college essay.
Very Perdictable.
it was made up of cute stares and i wish you were here's.
our love wasn't strong and it wasnt meant to last until the end of time.
but it was the sun.
it didn't reached every heart of the earth.
our love isn't the way you look at her.
and it isn't the way she looks at him with her lips on yours.
our love was held in our hands and when you let go, i was left palm up, with a couple notes and some old pieces of your heart.
that's her
Thursday, February 26, 2015her name was rachel and she had the sun in her hair and the stars in her eyes. she had dust in her hands, that turned people's ...
Thursday, February 26, 2015
her name was rachel
she had dust in her hands, that turned people's hearts to gold.
and she was the spring full of life and laughter, and I swear with her it was warm even when my hands were blue.
she was incredible,
and her smile made you wish it was sunday afternoon every wednesday night.
and I knew by the sound of the air if she was in my heart or my hands.
and that day I felt her slipping threw my fingers.
and that day the stars in her eyes became the stars in mine, and the spring became her sister, and the gold the gold, was gone. and the sun well that went with her.
rachel,
rachel,
put herself in a box in the ground.
because she thought spring looked better on her sister and the stars were getting to big for her eyes.
because she thought spring looked better on her sister and the stars were getting to big for her eyes.
and I know she loved us, but you can't put an empty casket in the ground.
her name was rachel
and she was incredible
and now that tree in the cemetery,
that's her.
k.i.s.s.i.n.g
Friday, February 20, 2015A kiss is a wonderfully beautiful thing. The electricity that happens is incredible. And a kiss is not just for high schoolers with t...
Friday, February 20, 2015
A kiss is a wonderfully beautiful thing.
The electricity that happens is incredible.
And a kiss is not just for high schoolers with the moon in their eyes and star dust on their lips.
A kiss is for everyone, every person, young, old, male, female, gay, straight, black, white. The list goes on.
A kiss is louder then a war, and softer then the beat of your heart.
A kiss tells you things you would never know.
It makes people vulnerable. It opens them to the world and pulls up their insecurities until they reach the surface of a bone shaking kiss.
I've been around the block a few times.
And one thing I know for sure is that there is only one kiss that has shook me so hard my heart fell out into his hands.
that's a kiss I wish everyone could have because once you have one like this you will never call someone a slut for kissing a boy at a party.
I promise she is searching for one just like she had.
So kiss because you never get you high school years back and you will never get the almost kisses or the I should've kissed him/her.
And kiss because it helps
And it can heal things that you thought could never be healed.
A kiss is worth a thousand words,
So use them more.
easy to touch
Sunday, November 23, 2014My hearts be given away so many times I'm not even sure that it's mine. There are days when I feel uncomfortable with the beat in...
Sunday, November 23, 2014
My hearts be given away so many times I'm not even sure that it's mine.
There are days when I feel uncomfortable with the beat in my chest.
I wish I had a heart like my brothers, locked up so tight it would take a fork lift to get it out.
But my heart is easy to touch.
Many people take there regret stand hands and reach into my chest and take her.
My hearts been passed so many times, and on most occasions dropped.
I wish I didn't have my heart in a bowl with a note that says take what ever you want.
So many times I've ripped her out and forced her into people's possession , when she knew it wasn't right but my broken hands were to prideful to say "no."
She loves deeply
And I wear her on other people sleeves.
I caused it.
She try's to tell me to stop through blood stained letters,
But I know what it's going to say and I would rather not hear that so I throw them away.
I turn my heart on airplane mode because my brain makes decisions I agree with.
20th
Sunday, November 09, 2014when ever i am with you, you just want to kiss. of course i give in to your charm and kiss you back, I think I screwed my self over. No...
Sunday, November 09, 2014
when ever i am with you, you just want to kiss.
of course i give in to your charm and kiss you back, I think I screwed my self over.
No one else seems to think so, well if they do they don't show it.
I wish i was more to you then just a pair of lips.
we were listing to songs that remind you of someone who messes with your head.
I wish I messed with your head.
but i'm not.
What sucks the most, is i thought that you were different, (maybe you are maybe i should stick around longer) but i can't waste my heart on something that "might" happen. i want to spend every night with you. but most of the time i just sit and stare at my phone only to get a snap chat of you with another girl.
i should probably take the hint.
so i'm done with caring because I have spent the last 5 months trying to get you. and no matter what i do it doesn't seem to work. i realize you could get any girl and i'm probably 20th on your list.
so i think its time these lips packed up and moved on.
so i think its time these lips packed up and moved on.
but when you've rubbed the pink off those first 19 lips, and you come looking for me,
and you remember 20 gave up, i hope it makes you think...
and you remember 20 gave up, i hope it makes you think...
were those first 19 were worth it.
i am a brick
Sunday, September 28, 2014When the only music I listen to is the 1975. I walk the halls dragging my personality with a rope hoping no one smiles at me. The humming ...
Sunday, September 28, 2014
When the only music I listen to is the 1975.
I walk the halls dragging my personality with a rope hoping no one smiles at me.
The humming of peoples voices is too much for my ears.
Times when the broken clock is a comfort.
Tears rim my eyes as I stare at the piles of homework that will never get done.
When the teacher reminds me of the test I kindly let escape my thoughts.
Almost rear end 13 people driving home from a cold uneventful weekend night.
My friends clap in front of my face, helping me escape from the prison of my mind.
I trip on the stupidly placed stairs in the commons.
The days when the word vomit doesn't come, and a brain freeze is not just a figure of speech.
My mom yells at me to do something I will never remember.
Days when "I will be logged out do to inactivity."
When i'm to tried to even push snooze.
Days when I say throw another because the loads already too much and one more won't hurt.
When reading with the rain isn't enough.
No matter how many times I try and say it, it gets caught in my throat and becomes mixed with all the other unneeded words.
I walk the halls dragging my personality with a rope hoping no one smiles at me.
The humming of peoples voices is too much for my ears.
Times when the broken clock is a comfort.
These are the days I am brick.
Tears rim my eyes as I stare at the piles of homework that will never get done.
When the teacher reminds me of the test I kindly let escape my thoughts.
Almost rear end 13 people driving home from a cold uneventful weekend night.
I trip on the stupidly placed stairs in the commons.
I am a brick.
The days when the word vomit doesn't come, and a brain freeze is not just a figure of speech.
My mom yells at me to do something I will never remember.
Days when "I will be logged out do to inactivity."
When i'm to tried to even push snooze.
Days when I say throw another because the loads already too much and one more won't hurt.
When reading with the rain isn't enough.
No matter how many times I try and say it, it gets caught in my throat and becomes mixed with all the other unneeded words.
These are the days that I am a brick.
Blue Paris
Sunday, August 31, 2014The mystery of the moon is intriguing. She sits up in the blue canvas all day, waiting for her turn to exist. She appears only after the ...
Sunday, August 31, 2014
The mystery of the moon is intriguing. She sits up in the blue canvas all day, waiting for her turn to exist. She appears only after the magnificence of the sun out shines her. Yet she fights for the right to be seen.
The moon is small and forgotten. She's held on the side of the earth surrounded by planets twice the size of her. The milky way galaxy engulfs the sad sphere of matter. She doesn't matter to him and he gladly swallows luna.
How many forget about the glorious glow that escapes her. How many people are caught up in the next ride to the top of their so called "high". To many pedestrians focusing on the asphalt under their torn up souls.
Yet,imagine life without the moon. She controls the vas expanse of water, and allows him to freely explore his capabilities.
How many young lustful teenagers enjoy their saturday night caffeine filled kisses beneath her expecting gaze. As more unsuspecting victims await her appearance each night.
But even with all of the forgetful people she expands her beauty. She's not worried that no one is talking too her, or that no one is having a love affaire with her. She is strong. She is here for herself.
But isn't it funny how the moon needs the sun to shine.
Just as Paris needs her writer's to survive.
So I take on her characteristics as I explore the sidewalks of Paris. I will learn to love the shops and street venders. The knowledge, wisdom and creativity that she has to offer.
Paris will become my home as luna continues to be my best friend. They need us. They want us, and expect us to come, to visit, to stay, to write, to paint, to love, to live.
So lets go to Paris, and visit luna on the way.
Him
Tuesday, July 22, 2014I feel it. I feel it in my legs. I feel it in my hands. I feel it in my blood. I feel it in my heart. It hurts. Man it hurts like hell. For ...
Tuesday, July 22, 2014
I feel it. I feel it in my legs. I feel it in my hands. I feel it in my blood. I feel it in my heart. It hurts. Man it hurts like hell. For some reason I can't turn it off I can't make it stop. I don't want to care more then anything in this world. Its killing me to love you, but for some reason I can't force myself to burn my feelings. It's hard missing you every second of everyday.
I want you so bad it's ripping my heart and brain apart. Waking up hurts. Living hurts. and I don't forget. I make sure that i don't forget, I keep reminding myself why I fell for you the first place. I am sleeping with the memories and you have deleted them off the back of your eyelids. You act like they are nothing when they're the only thing that keeps the lub dub of my heart going.
The semi there pictures that keep me hopeful that maybe one day you will click undo and they will reappear and you will come back and I will have no other choice then you let you slink back into the hole you created in my heart.
But until then.. I will feel it. I will feel it in my legs, I will feel it in my hands, I will feel it in my blood, I will feel it in my heart, and it will hurt, man it will hurt like hell...
I want you so bad it's ripping my heart and brain apart. Waking up hurts. Living hurts. and I don't forget. I make sure that i don't forget, I keep reminding myself why I fell for you the first place. I am sleeping with the memories and you have deleted them off the back of your eyelids. You act like they are nothing when they're the only thing that keeps the lub dub of my heart going.
The semi there pictures that keep me hopeful that maybe one day you will click undo and they will reappear and you will come back and I will have no other choice then you let you slink back into the hole you created in my heart.
But until then.. I will feel it. I will feel it in my legs, I will feel it in my hands, I will feel it in my blood, I will feel it in my heart, and it will hurt, man it will hurt like hell...
